Getting Personal: COVID-19 and My Mental Health

I want to start by saying forgive me for this post being a little all over the place and poorly structured, and punctuated. I'm sat here having one of those days where I feel like I'm frozen, and my thoughts are coming out in one big tangled mess, trying to defrost myself from this state of mind.

I've mentioned previously of how things have been in my personal life regarding my job status and where I'm at with things. Only now have I really sat down and thought about how all of the events of this past year has affected my mental health. I never really talk about things this personal, but I think its come to a point where I need to. 

Right now I feel useless, tired, frustrated, paranoid, and honestly, just sad. 

Catch The Rabbit by Lana Bastašić

 SYNOPSIS

Sara hasn't seen or heard from Lejla in years. She's comfortable with her life in Dublin, with her partner, their avocado plant, and their naturist neighbour. But when Lejla calls and demands she has come home to Bosnia, Sara finds that she can't say no.

What begins as a road trip becomes a journey through the past, as the two women set off to find Armin, Lejla's brother who disappeared towards the end of the Bosnian War. Presumed dead by everyone else, only Lejla and Sara believed Armin was still alive.

Confronted with their limits of memory, Sara is forced to reconsider the things she thought she understood as a girl: the best friend she loved, the first experiences they shared, but also the social and religious lines that separated them, that brought them such different lives.

Animal by Lisa Taddeo

 

SYNOPSIS

I drove myself out of New York City where a man shot himself in front of me. He was a gluttonous man and when his blood came out it looked like the blood of a pig.

That's a cruel thing to think, I know. He did it in a restaurant where I was having dinner with another man, another married man.

Do you see how this is going? But I wasn't always that way.

I am depraved. I hope you like me.

Obligatory First Post

Hello!

I used to have a blog called 'Emma's Bookery', so I'm not new to blogging but I felt that an introductory post was needed anyway. As much as I loved my previous blog, for some reason it didn't feel right anymore and I wanted to start afresh with this one, so hello and welcome to A Batch of Books.

My name is Emma, I'm 26 years of age and I started blogging in 2014. I live in the South East of England with my fiancé Sam and my cat Fergus (no doubt he will make an appearance on here at some point. 

At the moment I don't really know where my life is heading, but I'm doing my best to figure it out. The pandemic hit me quite hard. Some big and amazing life changing events happened; I bought my first home, I got engaged, but then on the flipside I was left unemployed in March 2020 from a company who ended up blanking me and ultimately not hiring me. My previous employer refused to furlough me, and from then on I've been applying for jobs and working for my brother in a convenience store. Without this job, I wouldn't be in my home and, well, I don't really know what would have happened.